spoilers: this is gonna end terribly

[wentnuclear]

» WHO? Raleigh and Yancy (sort of) and OTA for main log, closed starters in comments
» WHEN? 9am on the 20th - 9am on the 21st (this lasts EXACTLY 24 hours only though you can tag in whenever)
» WHERE? deck 2 corridors, mess hall, gym, Raleigh's quarters
» WHAT? Raleigh got an action. For a limited time only, a big brother!!! But there are a few catches...
» WARNINGS? massive pacrim spoilers, potential for violence/injury, discussions of death via giant alien monster and severe ptsd, will update if more arises!

[ As much as he doesn't really want to admit it, Raleigh is settling into a bit of a routine. The room he shares with Mako is even starting to feel... like theirs. It's strange, considering Raleigh has lived in many places without ever settling at all, has rented apartments that might as well have just been hotel rooms for all he nested. But the station feels sort of. Not homey but maybe like Shatterdomes used to. They've got pictures on the walls and a sense of camaraderie with their fellow captives. Though he didn't expect it to be the case, Raleigh actually likes most people he's met here.

Mako headed off to poke at the command deck early that morning and Raleigh hit the gym as usual, planning to meet her for a late breakfast after. That's where he's going now, freshly showered and running his fingers through his damp hair as he gets off the elevator on the mess hall deck. It's starting to feel a little longer than he likes to keep it, but it's not like the station has a barber. He ponders maybe asking Mako to try and trim it for him, but is thrown from his thoughts as he turns a corner and spots a jumpsuited figure lying on the metal floor, unmoving, a communicator droning the usual arrival message beside them. Somebody new is about to wake up. Raleigh breaks into a little jog, boots clanging, thinking that maybe he can be helpful. Help ease the stranger into this bullshit. That extra sound is enough to cause the man -- yeah, it's a guy -- to stir, groaning and sitting up. His back is to Raleigh, who notes idly that they have the same color hair. Go figure. ]

Easy, buddy. Take it slow, you'll be okay. Everybody wakes up with one hell of a--

[ He makes it to the end of the hall, slowing to a stop as the newcomer turns to look up at him and abruptly freezing mid-sentence because.

No.

This is impossible.

It's completely fucking impossible so clearly it's just the station fucking with him again, like people's visions and the voices in the walls. But Raleigh can't tear his eyes away, just stares in shock at his big brother, sitting there looking as solid and real as anything he's ever seen. Looking alive, somehow. ]

...Yancy?

Raleigh. [ The ghost's mouth quirks, and Yancy carefully picks himself up off the floor and glances around, moving stiffly but not like he's favoring any injuries. If he were a hallucination, wouldn't he be ripped to shreds? Not in a station jumpsuit looking like maybe he just had a few too many last night and is pissed Raleigh woke him up to enjoy the hangover. But he can't be real. He's dead, he's-- ] What kind of afterlife is this supposed to be?

[ Raleigh's mouth opens but nothing comes out so he just shuts it again, at a complete loss. It has to be a trick, but he finds himself playing along. ]

You remember?

Knifehead, yeah. Got us good, huh?

[ Slowly, he shakes his head. ] No, just... just you. Yancy, how--?

[ Something dark flickers through Yancy's eyes at that news, as it settles. Conflicts. And oddly, seems to resolve. He doesn't ask how he's here now, standing tall and holding a conversation, or where they are, or how Raleigh survived. He just lifts an arm, the same one Raleigh remembers him reaching out as he was torn away. Raleigh, listen to me, you-- and then the terror, the pain, and that terrible void. ] C'mere, kid.

[ Really, he should object. He's older now than Yancy was when he died, technically he's the big brother. Does it work that way? Who the fuck knows but he'd claim the technicality if he were processing this well enough to be casual about it. Instead all he can process is that Yancy is reaching for him and Raleigh just goes, nearly falling forward into his brother's arms and holding on tight. And it sure as fuck feels real. It must be. Somehow, Yancy is here. Tears prick Raleigh's eyes and he squeezes them shut. There's a lot of ground to cover, a lot of questions neither of them are going to be able to answer but some he can. They'll get there, though. Right now... ]

There's somebody you've gotta meet.

[ Anyone is welcome to have witnessed the tail end of this encounter, to hear Raleigh speaking brokenly to the silence of the corridor. No one else can see or hear Yancy, as they're about to find out. The brothers break apart and Yancy does ask something, then, but the simplest of the possible questions. Where are they? Raleigh huffs, then starts walking again, back down the hall towards the mess. The conversation is one sided to anyone around, Raleigh explaining things about the station like he's being prompted but there's nobody there. Who's he smiling at, looking so hesitantly joyful? Has he just snapped? You know what, just go over and ask him. ]

--

(( OOC: Okay so to keep things consistent regarding other characters' perceptions, I likely won't actually be RPing Yancy/describing exactly what Raleigh is seeing and hearing outside of what he tells people he is! You can wildcard catching a different one-sided convo (they're going to start arguing soon enough) or hit me up at cuddlebug to plot a closed starter, I may add something like a semi-OTA gym scene where they're sparring and Raleigh is inexplicably taking damage. ))

Comments

[morethan084]

[Daisy is on her way to the mess hall as well when she spots Raleigh, who she hasn’t seen in a minute. Smiling in amusement when she thinks she caught him talking to himself, Daisy waves at him.]

Hey. You talking to yourself?

[wentnuclear]

[ Raleigh pauses in the middle of storytelling -- he was describing the spacewalk they did while the gravity was out, making grand gestures to show how the debris was arcing over their heads and trying to smack people from the hull. Yancy seems genuinely riveted, for what it's worth, and after they meet Mako he's going to take his brother up to the observation deck for a good view.

But now he's glancing up at Daisy and smiling easily, even as his expression is a little confused. Talking to himself? What? He takes a deliberate step back in case his body was blocking Yancy, since he's between them and is the slightly larger of the pair. ]

No. Here, Daisy, meet my brother. Yancy, this is Daisy.

[morethan084]

[She expects him to sheepishly admit to being caught, but that's not what he does. Her smile falters a little when he steps out of the way and 'introduces' his brother to her. Was it some weird joke? She doesn't know him that well to really know what his sense of humor was.]

What? Is your brother invisible?

[wentnuclear]

[ Wait, what? Is she... serious? She looks serious, smile faltering with confusion as she looks to either side of him and focuses on nothing. The pit of Raleigh's stomach drops out and he looks to his brother, who seems just as perplexed as both of them but is still there. Still solid when he reaches out and puts a hand on Yancy's shoulder. He's not hallucinating this. Sure, people were seeing other things, but they hadn't ever made physical contact, right? ]

He's right here, I swear.

[ Then suddenly he's swatting something in the air between himself and Daisy, as Yancy reaches up and waves his hand in front of her face. Quit it, man, that's just rude. ]

[oorah]

[ frank wanders into the gym sometime in the afternoon, keen to find someone to spar with. if he can't he'll resign himself to the weight bench. his ever-present shadow max is with him this time, though he'd usually leave him behind. karen had been busy looking over footage on the bridge and he's half-expecting to find clary here anyway and they're his most consistent dog-sitters. max is getting acclimated to all the excitement around here anyway, so he's not too worried about bringing him down, at least not until he starts barking. and it isn't a playful or greeting bark but a loud, piercing, warning thing. frank grimaces as he looks out to see what max is seeing, because the dog doesn't run after anything or anyone. he just keeps barking, and it's the same way he'd acted when the hologram/ghost lady had shown up in his room. ]

Shit.

[ in the center of the mat where he usually boxes raleigh, and there's the man in question - but he's alone. alone and yet fighting for his life, seemingly, or at least getting a really serious fight sesh on. his eyes widen, hanging back to try to get a gauge of what's happening, but he has to wonder not for the first time on this station if his eyes are telling him the whole truth. ]

Raleigh? [ a belated call as he tries to hold max at his side. whatever it is the dog doesn't want to approach anyway, and frank's shushing eventually gets him to quiet some, though a persistent whine takes up its place. he turns back to the scene just in time to see raleigh's face snap back. fuck. there's someone really fighting him. his adrenaline is already spiking, not sure whether to reach for his knife or just go in with his fists. ]

[wentnuclear]

[ The brothers do notice Frank's entrance, thanks to it being marked by Max's barks echoing off the inside of the tin can they're all in. But they're so into this fight that... whatever. Frank and Max can wait. They're honestly not trying to injure each other, but each want to win. Each has a point to prove.

Yancy used to be better than Raleigh at everything, but that was five years ago and Raleigh's motivations have shifted. Besides, this particular argument? Is over Yancy and Mako's lives, therefore too important to lose and words hadn't done the trick. Frank can just watch, if he can get Max to chill out a little. The dog's distress is actually encouraging, anyway -- at least someone besides him can tell Yancy is there.

But he is aware that Frank can't, and when the other man calls out he reluctantly takes a step away, only for Yancy to press in and hit him with an uppercut that snaps his head back. He scowls at his brother and holds his hands up in a cross in front of him ]

Quit it, man, give me a minute.

[ As much as he'd like to drop to the mat for a break, he won't give Yancy the satisfaction. So they both stand there breathing hard, Raleigh wiping a trickle of blood from his lip. ]

Frank, meet my brother. Except you can't, actually. Fuck if we know why... Max, you see him, right?

[oorah]

[ the timeout gets frank to calm somewhat, or at least to not immediately go in swinging. though he's taken a few long strides towards raleigh anyway in concern. he finds himself holding his breath until the other man explains. his brother. his dead brother. his heart picks up speed, eyes wide with fear now. first he gets a strange visit from hologram captain, then alex is seeing ghosts, and now... what? at raleigh's question, frank looks down at max as if to try and capture his answer. the dog tilts his head to the side and starts whining again. he definitely sees something. and frank saw something hit raleigh alright. ]

Uh. [ fuck, what does he do? he turns to the spot max and raleigh are staring at and nods once. ] Good to meet you, Yancy. This guy loves to flap his gums about you.

[ does he feel weird talking to open air? YEP. but if that were maria he'd want people to pay her the same respect, right? except for one minor catch: what if it isn't yancy at all? ]

[wentnuclear]

[ Raleigh seems pleased with Max's response, as the dog is clearly reacting to Yancy and that's a huge relief. He knows this is real, but everyone else's blatant denial of it really had him shaken for awhile there. And he's braced for Frank to act the same way, to go on about station tricks and how Raleigh needs to get his head checked, until... he blinks in surprise as Frank seems to decide to trust him and Max instead, and addresses Yancy directly.

No one's done that yet.

Yancy looks shocked for a moment, too, then grateful for just a flash before he turns to Raleigh with a knowing smirk. Uh oh. Gotta nip that in the bud. ]

Don't get so smug, he's exaggerating. [ Raleigh rolls his eyes at his brother, but there's a hint of a smile on his face now too. ] He does that a lot.

[ A beat, then he's shaking his head at whatever Yancy just asked him. ]

Frank was the first person I encountered here. Mako's the only one from home.

[setpoint]

[Mako is just finishing up on the command deck when she feels a sudden, intense rush of emotions—disbelief and shock, relief and joy, and it's so out of place she freezes for a minute. It's Raleigh, but she can't think of any reason he'd be having such a sudden, overwhelming reaction, so she drops what she's doing and heads out, trying to find him.

When she does, he looks happy. Happier than she's seen him in... maybe ever.]

Raleigh?

[wentnuclear]

[ Oh, awesome, there she is. Raleigh didn't even have to call her to hurry up and get to the mess hall like he thought he might, if she'd gotten consumed by her work. He comes to a stop before her and beams like the sun, because even if this is weird and impossible, it's happening so.

He glances between Mako and Yancy with wide, eager puppy eyes, just waiting for her to recognize him and react. When she doesn't, immediately, he makes an encouraging gesture.

In his perception, Yancy is rolling his eyes a little at Raleigh's enthusiasm. You're so into this chick, little brother, don't embarrass yourself. But at the gesture he offers a greeting, his name, and a hand to her to shake.

But Mako is still only looking at him. ]

It's okay. I was freaked too, but... he's fine.

[setpoint]

[He's fine, Raleigh says. Mako can't see anything except the desperately happy, hopeful look on Raleigh's face, and she's utterly at a loss. She can feel that enthusiasm and excitement too, echoing off of him and she can't parse it.]

Raleigh... Who are you talking about?

[wentnuclear]

[ Wait... what?

No. Raleigh's expression falls, because he'd doubted too but then he'd been so sure... he is sure, this must just be a different kind of weirdness. It has to be. He reaches out and snags his brother's still-extended hand, reassuring himself. Yancy's fingers curl around his, warm and solid, and he frowns in confusion. ]

You really can't see him? It's Yancy.

[veristitalian]

Raleigh?

[Asks Jasnah, with no preamble whatsoever. She'd seen just the last of that, rounding the corner.]

Are you speaking into your communicator?

[The most logical answer. But for all the world, it had looked like he'd been talking to a ghost.]

[wentnuclear]

Hey, Jasnah-- what? No, we're...

[ He glances back at Yancy, confused, but his brother is as bewildered as he is. ]

We were just heading to the mess hall, if you wanna come.

[veristitalian]

All right.

[She says, following his glance, and feeling her eyebrows raise ever so slightly.]

But who is we?

[wentnuclear]

[ Raleigh frowns a little now, settling a hand on Yancy's shoulder just to reassure himself he's not losing it. Because obviously that had been his first thought too, but. No, he's right here. Even if Jasnah's gaze isn't settling on anything, isn't focusing. Like no one's there, to her. ]

My brother? He just woke up.

[resleeves]

[ a voice coming from the end of the hall catches kovacs attention and he looks up, mildly interested to see if it's anyone he knows. it's not. the man is tall, broad and blonde -- someone who would absolutely be utterly ruined in a world like this.

but, wouldn't it be fun to be the person to take part in that deconstruction?

he's talking but there's no one else there. as kovacs gets closer, it becomes clear that he's not talking into a communicator, he's just...talking. ]

The wall that fucking interesting?

[ kovacs looks over, eyes the wall for any weird shit that might be happening because of this fucking station but sees nothing. all right, then.

he doesn't judge, not right away, because it's not like he doesn't see a ghost or two. ]

I'm feeling a little left out of this conversation.

[wentnuclear]

[ It's a bit later in the day, and things have... devolved, a bit, since the brothers' reunion. The strain of everyone telling Raleigh he was just seeing things, and Raleigh eventually caving to the fact that they must be right because it's not like the entire station could be punking him at once, had brought out some bitterness in Yancy. One that had led to him punching Raleigh and storming off, but that, everyone was able to see. And had pulled him back around to thinking that Yancy was real. Something was happening, and it didn't make sense why no one else perceived him but he was clearly there. So Raleigh had given chase, a bruise rising on his jaw, trying to smooth things out. Yancy wasn't really having it. ]

What do you mean, I believed them because I don't want to face it? I've spent the past five years facing it, that's all I--

[ He's cut off mid-sentence by a stranger's voice, and glances up to see it's that guy who posted asking for drugs and hookers awhile back. Nothing Raleigh could help with. He doesn't recall the name, but he's a little occupied at the moment. ]

It's private anyway. But just for the record, I'm not talking to myself.

[resleeves]

You're not?

[ sure looked that way to him. he stopped, made a point of looking around, tapping on the wall to see if there was a secret compartment back there and then up to the ceiling. didn't see anyone but else but the two of them.]

Could've fooled me.

[ but again, should he really go judging someone for talking to what looks like thin air? when he sees quell sitting on his fucking bunk more often than not? she doesn't always talk but she's there and he's just so fucking fragged, it's sad. ]

Who you talking to, then? Mind if I say hi?

[ he lifts a hand, gives a two fingered wave. ]

Man's not talking to himself. Good to see the evidence of his words right here in front of my eyes.

[wentnuclear]

Yeah, I know, we just can't explain it.

[ At least this guy is making an effort, though, looking around and then asking who it is rather than condemning Raleigh to insanity right away. Or so it had seemed. Once Raleigh gestures for him to go on and say hello, he proves to be an ass. (In Yancy's rather vocal opinion, anyway, and Raleigh's inclined to agree.) He mirrors his brother's scowl but quickly schools himself back under control. He's really only got two modes of angry -- quiet and tolerant to avoid a fight, or snapping and punching you in the face. Hopefully he can maintain the former while both men are ragging on him. ]

It's my brother, he woke up this morning but can't communicate with anyone except me. His name's Yancy. [ Then, for both their benefits: ] I'm Raleigh. You are?

[notyourrookie]

[Unfortunately he still needs to eat, and the best place for that is in the mess hall. He heads down and slopes into the room, glad that he's picked one of the less busy times. Not that there are set mealtimes here, but some people insist on keeping to a schedule.

He recognises Raleigh but doesn't approach, instead going to grab himself some food. But his gaze is dragged back to the other man. he looks like he's talking to someone. Communicator?

He leans back in his seat, watching as he eats. he's not sure what, but something strikes him as subtly off.

[catastrophics]

[ wanda is on her way to the gym when raleigh is departing from it, and she smiles when she sees him, at first. but he doesn't seem to notice her. he runs past her and crouches to help someone behind her, and she whirls around to help him out with the new arrival she sees struggling to get to his feet. only -

only he's gone, once wanda's gaze focuses on him. there's nobody there. but raleigh seems to think there is.

she draws in a harsh breath at the realization, and then stays still for a moment, listening to what raleigh's saying and trying very hard to focus just on what he's saying, to whoever he's seeing. but some pieces of the conversation break through in spite of her attempts to be unintrusive.

knifehead, yeah. got us good, huh?

she hangs back for a moment, unsure of whether or not to interfere. but raleigh looks so shaken that she doesn't feel good about leaving this be. so she takes a few steps forward, making her steps deliberate so he knows someone is there. ]

Raleigh?

for Mako;

[wentnuclear]

[ It's late, nearly 3am, not that there's any sense of time on the station. After an awkward discussion with Raleigh playing translator between Yancy and Mako, the three of them had decided to just cram into the one double room, with Yancy in the floor spot where they used to swap places. In theory, anyway. Mako had finally nodded off a short time ago, but Raleigh and Yancy were still up, sitting at the little table speaking as softly as possible so as not to wake her. Well, Raleigh is anyway. It's not like it would matter to Mako's rest if Yancy was screaming his head off, but he's not the type to be obnoxious on purpose either.

Usually, anyway. Raleigh can't say he's thrilled when Yancy takes this opportunity to bring up the fact he and Mako are sharing the bed when Raleigh had told him earlier no, they're not like that, don't go there. ]

It's just practical. The floor's cold and painful, you'll find out soon.

You sure that's all it is? If you're just co-pilots... well.

What?

How long have you known each other, anyway? You seem really comfortable. And after how you told me you didn't want to go back, that five year mourning you supposedly did...

...the hell is that supposed to mean? It's like you don't believe me that I was wrecked after you died. Just because I got back in a Jaeger doesn't mean I'm not still a wreck.

It's good you did, though. You saved the world together, right?

Yeah. We did. I'm not... I'm not the same kid brother you had to shepherd. I fucked up, I learned from it, and I was not going to get her killed too.

Well, at least you learned something from my being ripped to shreds by a Kaiju. Good. I'm glad I could pave the way for you to be the hero next time around.

Yancy, what the--

[ And now Raleigh is raising his voice almost back to normal levels, and glances at Mako to make sure they haven't woken her. He didn't feel anything, but and she looks like she's still asleep, so he stands up and motions for Yancy to follow him into their bathroom. The door slides shut and the conversation continues, hushed but growing in intensity.

If their voices haven't woken her yet, the wave of distressed emotion might. Hurt and frustration and years of guilt being dredged up, because even if Mako had managed to buffet Raleigh's own belief that his brother hadn't blamed him in the moment. Well. Here was Yancy right in front of him, seeming to blame him now. Maybe just resenting that he continued to live, and that wasn't unrealistic. Of course his brother wants him to be happy, too, but in his perception he's just died. Of course it'd be complicated.

Should Mako go to the door to listen, it's hard to make Raleigh's voice out. Because now the conversation is actively about her. About how Raleigh's priority, even while saving the world, was saving her. Not making a mistake that would lose him a co-pilot again, but Yancy pushes. Is it really thanks to him? Or is Mako just special? It sounds almost like he'd be less offended if his little brother did admit to feeling something more for her, but Raleigh isn't there yet. No matter how many people call him on it. ]

It's not like that.

It could be. We're not all just seeing things.

...you go through shit like that together, you bond, and the Drift makes everything more. We were inseparable, too, remember? Doesn't mean that I should act on anything else, even if she's hot.

So you're saying, after all this time, you don't actually know what you're feeling? Come on, little brother. Don't bullshit me. You're hiding something, or you wouldn't be switching to Japanese with her around me.

No, I. [ Raleigh's sigh is muffled through the door. ] She's private, I'm not hiding anything from you. It's not bullshit.

Then admit it.

[ There's a long pause, while Raleigh makes an actual attempt to sort through it. Because he really hasn't, has just been pushing it aside as inappropriate, as their friends here being romantics without understanding the situation. Mako's looked at him, sure, but she hasn't... it's not... he groans a little, dragging a hand down his face. He really can't deny to his brother that he feels more for her than he's been admitting to anyone. To himself, and the realization sinks in uncomfortably. There's a bit of dread, because if he acknowledges this then it's real, and he's got to deal with it somehow. And he's pretty sure it's mostly on his end. But maybe spitting it out will end both arguments at once. ]

I do, okay? I love her, it's just not that simple. Are you happy now?

[setpoint]

[Mako has been trying to take this all in stride. She's just glad Raleigh hasn't found another room to stay in. After being so close since arriving on the station, she's not sure how she would have handled that sudden separation. All they have to do, she tells herself, is ride it out, and everything will sort itself out.

She wakes up in the middle of the night to find that Raleigh isn't in bed with her. In fact, it looks like he hasn't come to bed at all yet. After a few seconds of silence, she realizes what's woken her—Raleigh is in the bathroom, talking to Yancy, she assumes. He's trying to be quiet, she thinks, but his voice is tense and carrying. For a moment, she considers leaving it, but she's sick of seeing Raleigh miserable, and she knows those awful emotions she's feeling right now aren't hers.

She's halfway out of bed, a blanket still wrapped around her, when she hears him calling her "hot" and she hesitates, frowning. It's nice to hear, sure, but it doesn't mean anything, not after she just heard him say it's not like that about fifteen times in varying ways. She doesn't want to hear this, though. It's just reinforcing what she already knows, something she doesn't need reinforced over and over, so she swallows and forces herself up. She's almost to the bathroom door when she hears the last comment and she freezes, heart skipping a beat. For a long moment, she's not sure what she's feeling. Relief and uncertainty and a sudden strong rush of affection all mingled with guilt, because she's not supposed to be hearing this, and she knows it. She's giddy with it, even as a part of her insists she must have heard wrong.]

[wentnuclear]

[ The rush of emotions hits Raleigh like a wave as soon as the words are out of his mouth, but it's... definitely not his. Relief, affection, joy, it's so incongruous to the argument he's having right now that he recognizes it instantly as Mako's, which means...

She heard him. She's outside listening, and probably getting blasted with his panic at that realization. Because what the fuck is he supposed to do right now? With this. He was not planning to tell her any of this, probably should have left the room entirely but this isn't exactly a conversation he wanted to have in public either, and is honestly really confused by the response. Is she just happy because... it's a nice thing? Or. That doesn't seem possible, have they really been this clueless for months now...? Was Frank right? Raleigh is... almost too scared to find out but he can't hide in the bathroom forever.

Mercifully, Yancy (who was looking rather pleased with himself at getting the confession) has noticed his expression and put two and two together, and is now standing there quietly waiting for his little brother to make a decision. Not gloating or rushing him, just... glancing between Raleigh and the door like 'come on, bro.'

Fuck. Okay. It'll be okay. Whatever happens, even if she just turns him down and asks for space or something, he can deal with that, right? He's not going to lose her, even if he handles disappointment about as well as a wet paper towel could catch a brick.

With a slightly shaking hand, he hits the button to open the bathroom door and it slides out of the way between them. He looks like a jumpsuited deer in headlights, to be quite honest. ]