reverielogs | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

» WHO? The Roci Crew and whoever else wants in on this mess
» WHEN? after the gravity is back
» WHERE? A few different places
» WHAT? A few different prompts as well as a catch-all for any roci crew or related logs for the month of june
» WARNINGS? these are all just terrible people what do you want from me

001: Alex, Bobbie and Amos are Judging You

The Martians and the Earther are sitting at a table in the Mess Hall, and they've started a game. That game? To rate everyone else on the ship in order of attractiveness. Want to be rated? Find the comment header below, drop a picture in of your character, and watch the comments fly. Feel free to overhear them and give them hell.

002: Closed, Alex >> Frank

Going on the morning walk-about to search for Holden was ritual, at this point, and Alex was very used to Frank coming over first thing before they headed out. So the door was already open, waiting for him. Alex was fishing through his drawers, trying to find where he'd stashed that singular glove that he'd found, to show him for a laugh. But instead his fingers found something else - a thin sheet of plastic, creased and bent a hundred thousand times, and Alex's heart nearly stopped.

He pulled it out of the drawer like it was made of plutonium, careful not to touch the edges of the drawer with it.

Christ. Oh, Christ.

003: Open, Alex >> Anyone who wants to find this wrecked man.

He goes straight to the bar.

It's not that he isn't a fairly regular fixture there, anyway, but especially right now, all he really wants is to drink until he numbs everything. So hi, have a depressed Martian with a bottle of who knows what, sitting at the bar and just staring at a picture of a woman and a child smiling lovingly at the camera. He keeps stroking his thumb over it, then looking wrecked and saying something like 'god damn it' under his breath before he pours himself another drink. One of his arms is still wrapped up in a sling against his chest.

If he recognizes you, he might look up when you get close, and sigh. "Hey, partner. Everythin' alright?" Because it's a lot easier to worry about other people, than to keep being miserable about yourself.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Alex had never known Amos to be much of a theorist, so he just sort of nodded. Made sense. ]

I've been thinkin' about it, but I can't figure out a way in hell it even happened in the first place.

He looked surprised, even if his reflexes were slower after having downed far too much alcohol. He was never great at hiding his reactions or his emotions, so the fact that he wasn't expecting the abrupt movement was obvious.

But when his brain caught up to what must have been happening, shame crept in on his expression instead.

Yeah, he would't want to be around him, either.

"Uh - thanks." He doesn't know what else to say, and it comes out lame. His eyes fell back to the picture in his hands, and the weight of the guilt rested even heavier.

He lets out a soft huff of a laugh, glancing over at Frank, a grateful look on his face.

"I'll take your word for it, then, Partner," He murmurs. "Still would feel a lot better if I could know for sure."

"... Shit."

It isn't eloquent, but it's heartfelt. Raw. He watches Mike, his expression nothing but sympathy.

"That - They could still be out there, though, right? If you didn't find 'em, then at least that means they could still be out there--"

But losing a son? That was enough to ruin a man. He swallowed, his throat suddenly tight. "... We-- Melas should have been one of four. I know it - ain't the same, as losing a kid you got to - to meet, to hold, but--"

But it had still torn holes in him that he could never fill again.

You can say that again. [ He murmurs it lowly, then seems to recognize what he just said, and makes a face. ]

No. Never mind. Don't say it again. I already feel like I'm jinxing the whole damn thing every time I think about it too hard.

But I think there are a hell of a lot of shoes still waitin' to drop, if I'm honest.

Alex just looks at him and then slowly nods.

"... Figure if I - I can't even trust my own god damn head, Miller. But if someone else could take a look - Someone who might even know what the hell they're lookin' for--"

He didn't look at Frank, eyes fixing somewhere far away in front of him.

"... I - I don't even know how to describe it, Frank, and god knows I've been fuckin' tryin'. It was like all the water just - started pouring out of me, like I was sweatin' every damn drop of water in my body out through my skin, an'--" He pulled his hands up, checking them. Still okay.

"I could see my skin just hangin' of my bones, and all my muscles stopped workin' right--"

"That's one damn way of puttin' it." Lowly, darkly.

"I - I know this is gonna sound crazy, hoss, but I swear it - it at least seemed like it happened. I--" He halted, the words failing him despite having tried to tell this story many times before.

"I started to - hell, I don't know. Like all the water in my body suddenly needed to be out of it, leavin' every damn cell and watchin' myself shrivel up, my muscles disappear--"

[Daisy laughs bitterly when he mentions there being a lot of shoes waiting to drop. Accurate.]

I guess it’s not that different to home. Minus the whole being in space thing.

[So many things have gone wrong back home and now she has no way of even trying to fix things. At least she’s here’s, where she can’t destroy the world. Even though Fitz had made sure that she would.]

So where did you call home before all of this?

Edited 2018-06-14 16:48 (UTC)

"We will."

It's less of a promise, more of a fact. There's no questioning it. Apollo will do everything in his power to get them all of this station, come hell or high water. There's no disagreeing with him once that he's set his mind to something: Apollo has done more ridiculous things in the past and lived to tell the tale. It doesn't matter how many doors he has to burn his way through. Hell, if he has to pick up this entire station and carry it to the next solar system, he will.

But he doesn't say that. He just nods distantly and repeats himself, a little quieter this time.

"We will, yeah."

Apollo's gaze falls to the picture in Alex's hands again.

"When was the last time you saw them?"

( it's such an odd thing to be concerned about, but after a second of incomprehension, the pieces form a picture that makes sense, for all that it seems wildly implausible.

still, he has to ask: ) Is that what happened to you? Dehydration. ( it shouldn't be possible, but the limits of the possible have already been stretched beyond all measure.

firmly: ) No. You won't. I'll stay and make sure of it.

"Wh-what?" The word is uttered quietly as Bodhi stares in wide eyed shock. His eyes flick down to his own hand, still on the other man's elbow. Solid and real. Swallowing thickly, he tries to come up with a question, or something.

It's not that he doesn't believe Alex, it's the fact that he does, that he finds scary. That something obviously terrible had happened, and yeah - that'd do it. In a place where people get swallowed up in doors and there was no sign of what had happened to the people before them?

Yeah.

He opens his mouth and closes it once or twice before replying. "But you're fine, now. You're not --"

With another shake of his head, and before he can talk himself out of it, he wraps his arms around the other man. It's stiff, and seems like he hasn't been on the giving or recieving end of any kind of hug in a really long time, but it's something right?

He blinks a few times, but then he's nodding his acquiescence. "You want to be there when I look around?"

"Yeah, I know." He thinks of David and the rigged cameras all over his family's house. He'd been there for every moment he'd missed, only hammering home his absence that much more. As much as it sucks to not know, Alex wouldn't be doing himself any favors in the end. "...What happened?" It's gentle and he looks away so the other man doesn't feel on the spot. Or as much so. His gaze drags over the spot on Alex's left hand and his missing wedding ring. Just looking at it makes him feel the weight of his on his finger. He doesn't even know where it ended up after they'd taken it off him in the hospital.

Frank feels himself go a little pale a the description, but he's listening carefully anyway. He knows this place is capable of it after the things he'd seen, even if they weren't as extreme as all of that. "Jesus," he mutters softly though that guy had no place here and he knows it. He reaches out to squeeze Alex's elbow with his free hand, tucking the protein bar into a pocket with his other - he's decidedly Not Hungry Anymore.

Space, actually. [ He offers a rueful look. ]

Nah, if I'm precise - I'm from Mars. Born and bred. But I ain't been on the surface in years. I'm a pilot, so - mostly live ship bound, sometimes get shore leave on Ceres or somewhere else in the belt.

But most lately I've been livin' on the Rocinante.

[ There's a pause. ]

If you're surprised about the Mars thing - don't be. Turns out almost no one here comes from a time or place where Mars is even colonised, let alone independent.

What about you?

[She was actually about to comment on the whole Mars thing when he stops her.]

Yeah, it's definitely not a thing back home.

[Finger trailing down the side of her cup, Daisy gives a small shrug in response to his question.]

Earth. Which sounds pretty boring compared to being from Mars.

[Bobbie has already decided that she's not going to sleep. She's been trained to deal with sleep deprivation, and if it makes Alex feel better, a bit of tiredness is worth it. She's also camped out against a wall, though she's sitting on the floor, and even though this is a family room, it's still small enough with this many people in it that they're all pretty crammed together, so it's easy to keep an eye on Alex. He's been quiet and distracted all night, and the way his hands tremble doesn't escape her attention, either. She doesn't know how to make it better, but that doesn't mean she isn't trying.]

Hey. What other Kamal family recipes are you keeping in your back pocket?

He nods, solemnly and slowly, to the words. They would, because they had to.

At the question, though, he seemed to sink a little.

"Five years." It was a quiet admission. "In person, anyway. And - months, since... Well. They think I'm dead, back home. Went down on the Donnager. Died a hero."

"I get it."

The thing is, she doesn't exactly have a game plan for what to do if everything he's saying did happen, and it happens again. If one of them starts disintegrating, or whatever it was, what can they do to stop it? It's leaving her feeling frustratingly helpless.

"We'll sleep in shifts, and we'll figure out what happened. There has to be an explanation."

He stares down into his glass, tipping it back and forth to make the liquid splosh around in low gee.

"... It's a long story." His voice was quiet. "And not a particularly - it ain't somethin' I'm proud of. But the short version is, I - never could quite hack it. Planet side. And bein' a pilot wasn't - compatible with bein' there with them." He looked more uncomfortable as he continued. "... Then the Donnager went down, and there I was, technically dead. And not just dead, but a dead hero, and I..."

He didn't finish the sentence.

Frank nods, he gets that too. He pats Alex's knee but continues looking on straight ahead. It's easier for them both to share this way, he thinks. "Maria used to say things like that. That I was - incompatible with civilian life. I think she was probably right. And I've been dead a couple times, too." Not exactly as a hero, though... but solidarity?? Or something.

He didn't have a game plan either.

He just knew he didn't want to be alone, if it happened again. No one should have to go through that alone.

He nodded, breathing out slowly.

"... Yeah. There's gotta be a way to explain it. Even if it's just that I'm - that I'm losin' it."

He lets out a breath - not quite a sigh and not quite a laugh, but somewhere in between.

"Who's Maria?" Since he didn't think he'd heard the name before, even if the story was extremely familiar.

He hasn't spoken her name to anyone here - hasn't dared. Frank wets his lips and traps his wrists between his knees, steeling himself for what comes next. It's always the worst part.

"She was my wife."

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Page 17 of 37