Alex "not in love with a spaceship" Kamal (
donkeyballs) wrote in
reverielogs2018-06-08 01:12 pm
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» WHO? The Roci Crew and whoever else wants in on this mess
» WHEN? after the gravity is back
» WHERE? A few different places
» WHAT? A few different prompts as well as a catch-all for any roci crew or related logs for the month of june
» WARNINGS? these are all just terrible people what do you want from me
001: Alex, Bobbie and Amos are Judging You
The Martians and the Earther are sitting at a table in the Mess Hall, and they've started a game. That game? To rate everyone else on the ship in order of attractiveness. Want to be rated? Find the comment header below, drop a picture in of your character, and watch the comments fly. Feel free to overhear them and give them hell.
002: Closed, Alex >> Frank
Going on the morning walk-about to search for Holden was ritual, at this point, and Alex was very used to Frank coming over first thing before they headed out. So the door was already open, waiting for him. Alex was fishing through his drawers, trying to find where he'd stashed that singular glove that he'd found, to show him for a laugh. But instead his fingers found something else - a thin sheet of plastic, creased and bent a hundred thousand times, and Alex's heart nearly stopped.
He pulled it out of the drawer like it was made of plutonium, careful not to touch the edges of the drawer with it.
Christ. Oh, Christ.
003: Open, Alex >> Anyone who wants to find this wrecked man.
He goes straight to the bar.
It's not that he isn't a fairly regular fixture there, anyway, but especially right now, all he really wants is to drink until he numbs everything. So hi, have a depressed Martian with a bottle of who knows what, sitting at the bar and just staring at a picture of a woman and a child smiling lovingly at the camera. He keeps stroking his thumb over it, then looking wrecked and saying something like 'god damn it' under his breath before he pours himself another drink. One of his arms is still wrapped up in a sling against his chest.
If he recognizes you, he might look up when you get close, and sigh. "Hey, partner. Everythin' alright?" Because it's a lot easier to worry about other people, than to keep being miserable about yourself.
» WHEN? after the gravity is back
» WHERE? A few different places
» WHAT? A few different prompts as well as a catch-all for any roci crew or related logs for the month of june
» WARNINGS? these are all just terrible people what do you want from me
001: Alex, Bobbie and Amos are Judging You
The Martians and the Earther are sitting at a table in the Mess Hall, and they've started a game. That game? To rate everyone else on the ship in order of attractiveness. Want to be rated? Find the comment header below, drop a picture in of your character, and watch the comments fly. Feel free to overhear them and give them hell.
002: Closed, Alex >> Frank
Going on the morning walk-about to search for Holden was ritual, at this point, and Alex was very used to Frank coming over first thing before they headed out. So the door was already open, waiting for him. Alex was fishing through his drawers, trying to find where he'd stashed that singular glove that he'd found, to show him for a laugh. But instead his fingers found something else - a thin sheet of plastic, creased and bent a hundred thousand times, and Alex's heart nearly stopped.
He pulled it out of the drawer like it was made of plutonium, careful not to touch the edges of the drawer with it.
Christ. Oh, Christ.
003: Open, Alex >> Anyone who wants to find this wrecked man.
He goes straight to the bar.
It's not that he isn't a fairly regular fixture there, anyway, but especially right now, all he really wants is to drink until he numbs everything. So hi, have a depressed Martian with a bottle of who knows what, sitting at the bar and just staring at a picture of a woman and a child smiling lovingly at the camera. He keeps stroking his thumb over it, then looking wrecked and saying something like 'god damn it' under his breath before he pours himself another drink. One of his arms is still wrapped up in a sling against his chest.
If he recognizes you, he might look up when you get close, and sigh. "Hey, partner. Everythin' alright?" Because it's a lot easier to worry about other people, than to keep being miserable about yourself.
no subject
... My life is over. Back home, I've lost everything that ever mattered. My family, my friends, they think they've buried me, but this- [A single finger to her neck, just like before.] It was meant to save me, but I didn't want that. I was ready to die. Sometimes I think I even wanted to. So no, I don't value my life. It's empty, and it's dark, and it doesn't mean anything to me. Not compared to everyone else's, everyone on this station who has something to go back to.
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[ He tilts his head, giving her a look, still as empty as before. ]
We're just specks of dust. We don't matter, in the big picture. You can keep thinking I'm wrong, but it's the way it is.
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I don’t think you’re specks. [“You”. Not “we”.] I think you’re giants.
[Maybe, hours from now, she’ll realize who said that to her first, years and years ago.]
Everyone’s life matters. My life mattered. But that doesn’t mean that I wanted it.
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[ Amos doesn't stop looking at her. His face loses all expression as he speaks next. ]
I am what I am, I do what I do. But I'm a murderer. Does that make my life as valuable as someone like you?
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[Human minds aren't really that complicated. It doesn't take being a doctor to know that she never got over Danny, that her grief was the start of it all. She had always been a risk-taker, but she had never been quite so comfortable with the thought of dying before.]
And I'm nothing special, Amos.
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[ His tone is still as flat as it's been before, and he completely sidesteps her comment about depression, unable to even understand it right now. If he was feeling differently, like himself, he might find this conversation extremely interesting. As it is, he feels like he's just stating facts. ]
You should talk to Miller. He wants to die, too.
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[Not that doing it for the thrill is much nicer.]
And that certainly sounds like it would be a cheery conversation. I'll be sure to hit him up.
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[ He doesn't care if she used him. It just feels like it's the truth. ]
I'm just giving you more opportunities to talk about it. You don't have to take me up on it.
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You weren't an experiment. I slept with you because I was alone, and I was sad, and I wanted to forget. [The past tense is useless; all those things are still true. She was adamant about keeping her memories, back on the burnt-out husk of Gallifrey, but sometimes she wonders if she wouldn't change that call, now that she knows what it's like to go on when everything you've ever known is over.]
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A bit. [She looks pointedly away from him.] Enough that I wouldn't mind it again, sometime.
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An invitation, huh? I'll take it.
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I’ll give you a ring, then.
[Only she won’t, because Frank and his meddling will get in the way first.]
Don’t be a stranger, yeah?
[She’s got to go contact Alex. Something still doesn’t feel right.]
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[ She's given him the invitation, after all. He'd be a fool not to make the most of it, and Amos is not a fool.
He doesn't look back at Clara as she walks away. ]